Cell Phone Walkers

August 12th, 2013

I have been observing cell phone users – and who hasn’t? But this is only the beginning… I have a long list of cell phone burtches and kvetch’s. There are a million cell phone stories in the big city and this is just one of them.

Have you ever watched someone talking on a cell phone? I mean really watched. They don’t stand still! Well, some do but most just walk as they talk with that determined “get out of my way” look. Many pace back and forth in a predefined “land grab” of their own – oblivious to the world around them. And some even walk in circles, reversing their direction like clockwork.

Stay clear – which is hard to do – because these people haven’t filed a flight plan. They pace back and forth and side to side. And watch out for that empty hand of theirs, it could suddenly shoot out and up with no warning as they try to emphasize something to the recipient on the other end.

So pacers, circlers and walkers why not try sitting down, standing against a wall or leaning against a post and carry on your conversation out of harms way?

We’re Back Burtching and Kindly Kvetching

August 12th, 2013

It’s been too long! And for reasons that are not necessarily for prime time – there were reasons for the downtime.

But Burtch and Kvetch is back!

If you would like to review that “raison d’etre” for this site check out the Post titled What’s All About It.


The Big Bagel Burtch Part Deux

December 11th, 2009

Now that I’ve cleared up the proper use of the word bagel, (see my post for the Big Bagel Burtch Part 1 from November 25 by clicking here), it’s time to address the real crux of The Big Bagel Burtch.

Yes, I was born and raised in Montreal, The Bagel Capital of the North and I spend as much time as I can in New York, The Bagel Capital of The South. I am not going to participate in the debate over which capital has the better bagel – not yet anyway. If you’re in to that debate look at the New York Times City Room article I have linked to by clicking here.

What I really want to burtch about is the ridiculous amount of bagel “flavours.” Where is it written that a bagel should be flavoured? Oy!

So here’s the thing. The bagel, as originally conceived, was baked in two varieties. Got that? Two varieties, not flavours. When you went to the Bagel Factory you stood in line and were seduced by the wonderful smell of freshly baked bagel. As you made your way to the front of the line you only had one thought on your mind: poppy or sesame. And, by the way, most people bought their bagel at The Bagel Factory. Very few conventional bakeries sold bagel unless they were re-selling Bagel Factory Bagel.

So where did we go wrong? What happened? Now it seems everybody is selling bagel – and not just poppy or sesame! They’ve got garlic, chive, pumpernickel, oatmeal raisin, one grain, three grain, nine grain, multigrain and… and… blueberry! FEH!!!

Save the bagel in its original form! Cast aside flavours and embrace the variety in poppy or sesame bagel only.  Build Bagel Factories and the people will come!

Here’s my fantasy, which takes me back a bit to the days when the Bagel was truly respected. By the way, if you can find a copy of Don Bell’s book titled “Saturday Night at the Bagel Factory, and Other Montreal Stories” it will help you appreciate my fantasy.

You usually only bought bagel on Saturday night and ate two or three of them in the car on the way home. The rest were for Sunday morning breakfast when they were smothered with butter or fresh cream cheese and lox – either salted or unsalted of course.

That’s what made Sunday morning special and that’s what made a bagel special.